Apologies if this isn’t the right sub. I’m wondering if anyone else has had a similar experience. This is NOT in any way criticizing classical music or anything – I’ve been a classical enthusiast for over a decade. I’ve noticed that the more and more I’ve listened to and understood music, I had significantly dwindling interest in social activities in general and I was more easily worn out from socializing. But the times I took time away from classical, I felt like I socially grew more and was able to feel closer/reach more common ground with other people. I also felt less like I was developing as a person in my abilities to express and carry myself in a way that makes me feel like I have a place in the world or something like that, basically the definition of socializing (interacting with others to develop a sense of identity).
I think I’ve seen this in a few appraised classical musicians in general. It’s not that they are socially withdrawn or genuinely indifferent but rather they are just so enamored with classical music and nothing else provides the same joy. I pick up on the vibe that some of the most musically fine classical performers are shy in general and wouldn’t like social functions. Music speaks not only to emotions and feelings but very deep cognitive thoughts as well; it’s truly an amazing art that has had my attention captivated for very long periods of time.
I’m not saying this is a bad thing, but for me it’s almost inescapable. I get really spiritually energized and stuff from playing (on piano) and listening to Bach, Mozart, and Beethoven, but I feel a detachment from the social world the deeper I go into music. After a really long “classical phase” or listening session, I feel like when I try to have a conversation to anyone about anything, I’m babbling. Words are coming out of my mouth and I’m not monotonous, but I’m not really expressing emotions in a relatable way or such that it provides social insight into myself as a person. Now that I think about it, the way Glenn Gould speaks is much like this, and he has exceptional musical understanding. And when you really think about it, playing music is such a weird thing to do. I sit at the piano and press down a bunch of keys using varying force, duration, articulation, etc. in different orders to play different pieces, and I use it as a vehicle to express my thoughts and feelings. Sure, music is the universal language, but it’s so mysterious how I feel when I then try to talk to someone about anything.
Does anyone have any similar thoughts/experiences?
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